LandingPad Buenos Aires

It’s bound to happen eventually. At one point or another, everyone makes a humiliating mistake while speaking Spanish. But whether you’re aware that you have committed such an error is another question entirely.

The following are some of my favorites that I have heard about, committed myself or overheard in my days here in Argentina. Hopefully all you readers out there can learn from these mistakes and avoid committing these errors yourselves!

If you have overheard or been guilty of this yourself share with us at contact@landingpadba.com. We’d love to hear from you!

Here we go:

Intended word: remera (t-shirt)
Intended statement: I would like that T-shirt over there please.
What was said: “Quisiera la ramera verde ahí por favor .”
Translation: I would like the green whore over there please.
Conclusion: Intergalactic hussies.

Intended word: vergüenza (embarrassed)
Intended statement: I was so embarrassed.
What was said: “Yo tenía mucho embarazada .”
Translation: I was very pregnant.
Conclusion: Ouch, we’ve all heard of this one. One of the most common beginner mistakes using the logic, “Just put an O or an A at the end of the English word you want to say and maybe it will be close” technique. Clearly, this doesn’t always work out for the best.

Intended word: pera (pear)
Intended statement: I would like 5 pears please.
What was said: “Me gustaría 5 perras por favor .”
Translation: I would like 5 bitches please.
Conclusion: The rolling of the R, when used unnecessarily, could win you a harem.

Intended word: caballo (horse)
Intended statement: We rode horses yesterday.
What was said: Ayer montemos cabellos .
Translation: We rode hair yesterday.
Conclusion: There are no words for this one.

Intended word: cono (cone)
Intended statement: I would like a small cone please with vanilla.
What was said: Quisiera un coño pequeña por favor, con vanilla .
Translation: I would like a small pussy please, with vanilla.
Conclusion: Watch that ñ! Granted that coño is slang in Spain, most of the Spanish-speaking world understands that word.

Intended word: pechuga (chicken breast)
Intended statement: I’m going to eat the chicken breast with mushroom sauce.
What was said: Voy a comer pecho de pollo con salsa hongo .
Translation: I’m going to eat chicken boob with mushroom sauce.
Conclusion: Pechuga means chicken breast. Pecho leans more toward human breast or the word boob.

Intended word: tomar (take)
Intended statement: I took a cab.
What was said: Cogé un taxi .
Translation: I humped a taxi.
Conclusion: Humping cars is not a crime, damnit.

Intended phrase: No way!
What was said: Mi en pedo !
Translation: Me in a fart!
Conclusion: Tricky phrase that has crushing consequences if used wrong. Be sure to use the N and not the M. “Ni en pedo ” means “no way”.

Intended phrase: I read it in a forum.
What was said: Lo leí en un forro .
Translation: I read it in a condom!
Conclusion: Once again that tricky roll of the R is not necessary.

If you’re interested in learning more slang phrases and swears from Argentina be sure to refer to Paul Perry’s “Swears Translated” articles.

Rex Racer
LPBA Staff